Scribble Dribble

Parent's are going on a cruise starting tomorrow (Friday). I get the whole house to myself, which is cool... but when I gave it some more thought, it's going to be pretty lonely. I mean yeah I have my dogs, but I don't really have anyone to accompany me or keep me occupied. And it just makes being single suck even more. ^^;;;; Of course, I'm not going to go out of my way to look for someone, nor am I waiting for someone to come find me, but it just makes me wish the shit that happened... well, didn't. Now, I'm not implying that I want a relationship for the sake of having a relationship. I really loved my ex whole-heartedly. The thing is, I never gave up when we broke up. I just got mad and said stupid shit, but that never changed my feelings at that time. Like it really matters now... I dunno, I'm getting by a lot better than I was these past several months, but I can't help but to miss what was every now and then. I'm only human after all. Bleh... I'm letting my emotions show again. I think it's just the fact that I'm getting older and coming to terms that I can't really find someone anymore. I don't know how to engage in a conversation to create a relationship. Girls (in most cases from what I'm aware) have it easier. If a guy thinks they're cute or whatever, then most likely the guy will engage. I guess I was just so wrapped up with my ex I kind of figured we'd always be together forever. In the end, I forgot how to do these things... never really thought we'd be apart. So, I'm just in a sticky, sucky situation. ^^;; Maybe I'll find someone, eventually... *shrugs*

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